After years of being bossy and overbearing, my basic apologies meant little. They don’t always see my hands off approach as sincere kindness, but my motives are pure. It’s possible to be too early in the healing journey to start making amends.

Step Nine: Making Amends in Recovery

Emotionally, I am able to not “take the bait” for arguments when my soon to be ex-husband is taunting me. I am able to share about my struggles and finally take suggestions from others in the program. Thru this program I have been able to stay on my medications for depression and anxiety and am the most sober I have ever been. Hello, my name is Jordan, and I am writing to you about the importance of scholarships in sober living. Most drug addicts have no money saved and have torn down every relationship we have ever participated in.

We Are Ready to Assist You

• In one instance, I made what felt like a very awkward amends to an immediate family member.
• To learn more about addiction recovery, including AA, reach out to Silver Mist Recovery.
• Essentially, don’t make promises that you can’t keep and do everything you can to live up to the promises you do make.

Through donations and contributions from people who are also in recovery, we can encourage you to live a sober lifestyle. To make direct amends to such people, it’s important to approach them sincerely and acknowledge the damage done. You should express your regret for past behaviors and be willing to accept their feelings, understanding that you cannot control how they respond. Sometimes, making direct amends to someone may lead to further harm. For example, if you are estranged from a loved one and they will not see you, your indirect amends may involve reflecting on and modifying the behaviors that led to the estrangement. People with substance use disorder (SUD) can cause harm to others, either intentionally or inadvertently.

Take Responsibility

To make direct amends, it is important we are willing to make amends to the person face-to-face, no matter what happens, and respond in love and tolerance to anything they say. These interactions foster sincerity and openness, essential for the healing process. When I first came to recovery, I was certain steps 8 and 9 would be a breeze. After all, I hadn’t hurt anyone (Step 8), so I didn’t need to make any amends (Step 9). In fact, every day I make a living amends to my husband, son, Mom, living amends and brother Ricky. Amends allow me to also right the wrongs I may continue to make.

We seek a true partnership with treatment centers and sober living as well as recipients. Go here to begin the process to secure a scholarship to a sober living community. Living Amends recognizes the gap in the healthcare market in terms of insurance coverage for sober living. A true amend would what is Oxford House be giving him $20 back along with the apology. Understanding how making amends supports the healing journey reveals why this often-challenging step is so essential to lasting sobriety and personal growth. Importantly, AA and NA stress making amends without attachment to the outcome.

Why Making Amends in Recovery Matters

It’s an alternative when direct amends cannot be made safely or might marijuana addiction cause more harm. Honesty is key in determining impactful living amends, which require ongoing effort and dedication to show real transformation. Donating money, volunteering time, or providing care can serve as indirect amends when direct communication is not feasible. The key aspect of indirect amends is focusing on personal growth and changing harmful behaviors.

Relationship Journal Prompt Download

I have made life long friends in this process and feel so blessed to feel “a part of” a community of like minded people I can count on and they can count on me as well. It’s hard to describe in words how homelessness effects people. My plans are to continue things I do daily that help me stay on the beam in my recovery.

The Ongoing Nature & Power of Making Amends in Recovery

The 164 and More book is sold on this website at the Publisher List Price of $20.00 plus postage. The book may also be sold by Intergroup/Central Offices or recovery book stores at List Price  or slightly higher. But beware of others that sell the book marked up 400% or more.

To make amends means to apologize for something you have done or for wronging someone in some way. It means mending, or (quite literally) fixing, the relationship. Older children will more clearly understand our explanations of addiction and how that affected us, but that doesn’t mean we should spend much time on the subject. Living Amends will not be funding scholarships during the months of July and August 2025. The first step is to know that your questions and feelings are normal. We are small and run by woman in long term sobriety who are passionate about helping the next suffering addict or alcoholic.

This can mean restoring our reputations, and even restoring trust in a relationship. Rajnandini is a psychologist and writer dedicated to making mental health knowledge accessible. With over five years of experience in the field, she specializes in translating research into evidence-based, easy-to-understand content. If you’re a treatment provider and have a question, please reach out and someone from our Customer Success team will be in touch with you shortly. Accurate, complete profiles best connect you with the right people for your services.